While doing laundry, I had a brief conversation with my neighbor, Gary, who said women don’t know what they want. I disagreed, telling him that women most certainly do know what they want. We are not that difficult to figure out and neither are men. The NAKED TRUTH about relationships is this: we are all looking for the same thing – to be loved. It truly is that simple. Sort of…

Women want the following:

Men who are committed. We want a man who is committed to us. This doesn’t always mean marriage, however, we need a partner who won’t bail at the slightest sign of…well, anything from incompatibility to a disagreement. A boyfriend (who asked me to marry him) once told me things weren’t going to work out because we didn’t watch the same television shows.

Men who are loyal. We want a man who wants to be with us and ONLY us. We don’t want to share our partners with anyone else. Man is a dog’s best friend; we want the man in our life to be ours.

Men who communicate. We want to talk to the man in our lives. We understand that women are better at communicating, so we don’t expect you to be masters at sharing your feelings. We want you to try. We want to know that you think we are wonderful. Tell us we are sexy, smart, capable, beautiful. You will be rewarded handsomely.

Men who respect us. A relationship needs to be built on a strong foundation. We want to know that you cherish us enough to respect us. Value us for who we are. Do not belittle, degrade, or hit us – EVER.

Men who love us. It really all comes down to this – we want to know that you love us, that your life is better because we are in it. All of us – men and women alike – want to know that we are loved. It doesn’t get any better than knowing the person you are with loves you truly, madly, deeply.

What do YOU want in a relationship?

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  • I like a partner who knows when to stand aside and not get in the way just because they can’t relate. Just love me by letting me figure out what I need and not expect me to hold your hand through every decision.

  • Nicki – you said so succinctly what many authors have written books about – kudos to you for another inspiring read!

  • I totally agree. Men want respect first and for most. They also want to be told they are still handsome as they are aging. They also want SEX and to have physical affection. They also want us women to understand that they can’t always put into words what they are feeling and want us to pay attention to their actions (i.e. working to pay the bills, helping around the house, even sex is a form of showing feelings, and other small things.)
    These are just some of the things I’ve learned over the years. However, I also have a husband who taught me all of these things about himself. I did more research and he’s not alone on his thoughts.

  • I do think most men want to be assured that their women love them, just as we want them to assure us all the time of their love for us. More importantly, they want to be assured that they are good in bed and they make us happy in bed. As a woman, I want my man to respect me and make me feel that I am his one and only.

    I do agree that men mostly express themselves through their actions. My husband does a lot around the house to let me know that he cares; takes care of the children, does the ironing and even sweeps the compound to help the eldest child. And for an African man, that says a lot.

    • Hi Readin Pleasure,

      I discovered your blog today – it’s beautiful! I agree with what you said about what men want in relationships. For me, you hit the nail on the head with “As a woman, I want my man to respect me and make me feel that I am his one and only.” Yes!!! I’m glad your husband does a lot around the house to show you that he cares. πŸ™‚